The Beginning:
I get asked a lot about my photography and how it started. I have always been interested in photography and the arts since I was a kid. My interest for photography really started when a great friend of mine and an amazing photographer Pat Piasecki introduced me to it. He was a student at U-Mass Lowell. I had gone up to visit him and was amazed at some of the pictures he had taken. The contrast in his BW photographs really intrigued me. I then asked myself how can you capture such beauty through a lense. The little things in life were always and continue to be very important to me. With his encouragement I started on my photography journey. My first camera was a 35mm Canon from Sears. I started shooting but became increasingly frustrated with my lack of knowledge. I put the camera aside for about two years and actually wound up selling the camera soon after that. I still had an increasingly growing interest in it and wanted to capture things I saw through my eye or as I like to say “my lense eye”. A year later my father had purchased a 35mm SRT 202 Minolta camera at a yard sale. He let me use it and with the help of Pat and another friend I was learning the basics. They helped me learn about aperture, shutter speed, f-stop and so on. I started learning and going out randomly and taking pictures. I started to realize the beauty of photography. When you look through the lense you see what most people do not notice, because you are looking at it through a lense and pushing your focus of the small things to the limit. You can find beauty in just about anything and it is how you find it through that lense that creates your personal expression. The camera unfortunately broke and I was in a crossroads. I then decided to get a Nikon D40 SLR camera. I started to really develop and practice by trying to emulate photographers such as Gerhard Grasinger, Marvin Sodicoff, John North, Laurie Oneil and many others. I continue to work and practice my photography. It has truly become an art form for me and a way to express myself to the world and how I see things.
I have been extremely fortunate to have a great support system in place that encourages my growth in photography. I want to thank all my friends and family who have enjoyed and continue to enjoy my photography. I would not be doing this today if it was not for my friend Pat Piasecki. He is truly a great photographer with an eye for capturing.
Thank you again. I look forward to bringing you new photographs soon.
snapshotwriter.wordpress.com
The Shadow:
The heart beats with ever continued ache. The hands you felt once and embraced were now gone with a fleeting glimpse. Am I just not good enough for these feelings? Am I a failure at the one thing I long for. To watch a memory slowly form itself and know there is nothing you can do. The shadow that I once stared at on the ground slowly walks away. The miscommunication and misunderstanding seems to be what shines through now. Did I do it wrong? The walls I once carried are now a fleeting glimpse of what I once protected. Was it the words we never said or felt did not need to be said the demise to what I cherished? I ask myself these questions longing for the answer to the lost embrace I truly thought would stay. Did I not see what was there? Did I lose balance of who I was and what I strive for? The smile that once carried me through pain and dishonesty is now a picture in a frame I can no longer embrace. Should we have stopped and realized what was in front of us, put down the weapons and just taken the time to hear our hearts beat? The shadow that once stood by me is a shadow I truly miss. The shadow that gave comfort in times of despair is truly what I miss. The shadow that loved me and walked beside mine is what I truly miss. I once walked with comfort and love and a skip in my step. Was it our fault? Maybe so. I long for that shadow again, a shadow that will always walk next to mine. I miss that shadow.
snapshotwriter.wordpress.com
Ready for flight:
Sometimes their’s a day that goes by where you attempt to fly out of your own emotions and leave it all behind. The only hard part is when your heart is not ready to. It hinders your wing span and your running start, but then again your heart is the only thing that can give you flight. I just don’t think I want to fly away from my emotions. I think I lose more then I gain.
Long night:
Fire department, cops, ambulance and possible evacuation can make for a long and interesting night.
Drifting away
The hardest thing is to drift where the wind takes you. You can lose everything but gain freedom. Moving on is a challenge of ones own heart. You slowly feel the hands slip away from the comfort they once embraced. Sometimes the wind is to strong, and sometimes it is not the wind at all.
Personal Reflection
Personal Reflection
Originally uploaded by c.sturk
am not perfect, no one is for that fact. The one thing I can do is take responsibility for my own actions, my own failures and my own successes. I sometimes wonder if they feel the same, do they even see me the way I once saw myself. I see you, I say. But do they see me? Do they even realize how much pain I was willing to put forth with the risk of becoming extremely vulnerable? I opened myself up in more ways than I could have imagined, but did they truly see it or just ignore it because it was easier for them. Was love the answer, was it the key to unlock every door in your heart? Maybe one of these keys will work; someday I will find the right key. Personal Reflection.
Beauty from within
Beauty from within
Originally uploaded by c.sturk
What defines beauty? It is in the eye of the beholder right? Beauty is a vision some people only see in magazines, never in themselves. Beauty I think is an emotion of acceptance within yourself. Beautiful things surround us every day; do we see them often or sometimes ignore them because we are consumed with doubt within ourselves?
Beauty is more than just a word or an emotion, it is a self awareness. I find the beauty in the eyes. The eyes can tell a thousand words, it can allow you to see a story and a history that sometimes you otherwise would never be aware of.
Beauty is always within.
The Truth:
Sometimes the truth hurts. In my case I was not happy at all. I am 30 and felt like I was just turning into a lazy fart. When I started this I did not really think I could accomplish what I set out for. I surprised myself. When you take the negative aspects out of your life it is hard at first. You still feel attached to those negative personalities. After realizing you are the person you know you are when the negative aspect leaves you can accomplish anything. It has been a long road. If I can do it, anyone can.
snapshotwriter.wordpress.com
23 POUNDS LIGHTER:
This past year (2009) has been one extreme year. Family transgressions, losing someone you love to break up and learning how to stand on my own two feet. About 6 months ago I began a journey to better myself and achieve self-confidence and self-awareness. I lost who I was, do to influences in my personal life and now I am learning to regain control. I wrote down 20 things I wanted to accomplish and started to work down the numbers. It has taken quite some time for me to achieve where I am now but I am happy all the hard work is paying off. I knew I would not see results right away so I took it in stride. The new year, 2010 gives me the opportunity to put the past behind me and move on with the correct foot forward and allow positive people to grow around me. The last few months have been extremely difficult. When you realize you are not as important to someone as you make them to you, it can hurt more than words can describe. My goal was to better myself and continue to grow. This is the beginning and I am looking forward to tomorrow and the year ahead. 23 Pounds lighter:
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